I'd swim the Ocean for You
by keepsake.love
Summary: COMPLETED- READ!Kelsey is in love with her best friends little brother. She is feeling frustrated, hurt and confusion and doesn't know what to do about it. Other then hope that Nick will love her back. HOPEFULLY not your average story! PLEASE READ!
1. Take One word you said

**I own nothing. And remember to keep in mind that the JoBros are not famous. :) ENJOY ps; based on the song "Kelsey" By metro Station. **

**I'd swim the Ocean for you**

I've gone and done it again.

I've fallen for something I can't have.

I'm like a little girl at a doll shop. It's like every doll is someone different, and each different one I'm drawn too. This time, however, it's different, because it's my best friends little brother.

I think there's a rule somewhere that states you are not allowed to love your best friends little brother! Especially when you have grown up with him and consider him your younger brother (and you-his older sister). I've always seem to be his outlet when he needed one the most. When he broke up with his girfriend he came to me, or when he needed advice, he came to me. It's so wrong for me to be likeing him.

But he's just gotten so...cute.

In just 16 years he's grown up to be an adoreable boy, with the best hair ever. It should be a crime to have those curls. Maybe I'll have to look up different rules in different countries. I'm sure somewhere its a crime! I wouldn't mind running my hands in his hair.

"Hey Kelse what's up?" says the boy that I'm in love with. I look up and my green eyes match his deep brown eyes.

"Hey Nick. Um. Nothing is up. I'm just thinking." I smile at him. "Oh...What are you thinking about?" He asks me "Oh you know, the usual. My unhealthy love and obsession for Patrick Dempsey. Obviously." I laugh, and he just looks at me with this smile. It's so simple, and the definition of perfection. We look at eachother for what seems like 5 years-not 5 seconds. Nick looks away and picks up something on my bedside table.

"_Twighlight._ What's this?"

"Oh just the best book ever. You see Nick, inside this book is my husband to be. Well, what I'm striving for and what I want in a husband. Edward Cullen. So what that he's a vampire...it's ok."

He laughs again, "Kelse, you are crazy. But, I wish you good luck with finding a vampire in real life. Or, your future husband that will be just like him."

"Nick..it's possible."

"Well, good luck. But believe me, any guy will be lucky to have you" he smiles and quickly changes the topic to the Miley Cyrus photo scandal. There he goes again. Giving me those damn butterflies that always seem to haunt me. UGH! Why does he do this to me? I mean, come on! Not good, not good.

"Yeah, well, I'm just glad that neither of us are in that whole "celebrity" world." I say

"Oh I know. But soon enough I will be, when I become a famous guitarist slash heart-throb singer" he answers, while flashing me his trademark smile.

"Uhuh, whatever you say Jonas. Anywho, where's that crazy best friend of mine, Joe?" "Hah, you know, trying to make moves on his..'_ladies_'."

"Why am I not surprised?" We just laugh and casually chill on my bed, until I hear a knock on my door. "Come in!" The door opens to see a very flustered and red Joe. "Get shot down again?" I teased.

"Ugh, Kelse! Girls are lame. I mean seriously, come on! I'm good looking, with amazing hair and a beautiful smile. So, why wont a girl just fall in love with me? Geeze!"

Nick and I burst out laughing. "Joe, you are SO desperate! There is a girl out there for you, waiting. You just have GOT to slow down and grow some patience." I throw a pillow in his direction, and he catches it, returing it to my face. "HEY!" We both just laugh.

"So what are you guys doing?" Joe asks.

"Oh you know, I'm just making some moves on Kelse here." Nick jokes around with Joe, and I just sit there, smiling. When secretly, I'm wishing he wasn't making a joke. How I would die to have him acutally make a move on me. That will never happen though, because he doesn't like me. I'm like his "older sister", and besideds, he likes some bleach-blonde girl from his school- Eveline. How I just wish you would like me, Nick. Life would be alot less frustrating if you did.

"I was thinking of going to the park today. Anyone of you care to join me?" I get up and start grabbing my worn out vans and white sunglasses.  
"Sure, I will" Joe says. "I would love to K-dawg, but I have to go meet up with Riles and Trace. We're going to practice some sweet new songs for the talent show next month." Nick tells me. I try so hard to not show my dissapointment. "Ok Nick. Have fun. Tell the boys I say hey" He gives me the biggest hug. I relax into his toned arms, and take in his musky afterwash. "See ya!" And with that Nick is gone.

I turn around and smile at Joe. "Come on Jonas, lets go to the park!" He smiles and we link arms skipping all the way down the street.

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**I hope you are enjoying my story so far. I'm not quite to sure how long its going to be. I'll just see how the wind takes me. :) Reviews are always helpful. Please and thank you! **

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	2. You got your head pushed to my chest

**I'd swim the Ocean for you**

**DISCLAMER: I own nothing other then the story line, and my made up characters.**

**CHAPTER 2: You got your head pushed to my chest**

The morning was chilly but yet comfortable. It was the perfect afternoon for a stroll in the park, but yet not to chilly to wear shorts. Well, according to Joe it wasn't. I swear, that boy loves those pair of shorts. He must have had those since we were about 10. Did I meantion we're 18. 18 years, and the same pair of shorts. I'm not quite sure if thats even heigenic!

We arrived at the park in five minutes. Once we got there, yelled "TAG! You're it!" and sprinted to the jungle gym. The park was a stress reliever to me. It brought back all my childhood memories, and the innocence that came with it. When you're a kid, you have absolutely no worries. You have this innocence to you. Not a care in the world, and your free. You can sleep in as late as you want, don't have to work, and don't have to worry about who you're taking to prom. Boys are no intrest to you, because they still have cooties. You can dance in your underwear and eat ice cream without worrieing about calories. Life as a kid was so easy! So...simple. How I wish it could last forever. Sometimes, I wish my name was Wendy and that my best friend was Peter. When Joe and I were 6, we always pretended we were them.

**FLASHBACK:**

_"Look Joe, I'm flying!" Of course I really wasn't but, it's called make believe. I love to pretend! Especially pretending I'm Wendy from Peter Pan. Of course, Joe was Peter. He's my best friend. We've been friends since we were 2. Talk about a LONG friendship! _

_"OFF to Neverland, Wendy! Whoooo! Look at me! I'm a bird-Ouch!" Joe jumped from the top of the jungle gym into a pile of wood chips. _

_"Are you ok?" I burst out laughing as he spits out a mouth full of chips. "Yuck!" I laughed even harder now. We just sat there, laughing. This park is the best place to hang out!_

**END**

I sit on the same pile of wood chips that where in Joes mouth 12 years earlier. "Remember when we were 6, and you thought it was a brilliant idea to jump from the top of the gym, because you thought you could actually fly?" He runs over to me and plumps onto the ground, laying there, hair full of wood chips.

"Yeah. Ok you know what, Kevin told me that the pack of sugar was really magic flying dust. I mean it was so real!" He had such an innocent expression on. I just laugh at him even more. I lay down on the wood chips, and place my head on Joe's chest. "Oh Joe. What will I ever do with out you?" I say, as I casually pick chips out of his hair.

"You would not have an excuse to gawk at my little brother!" I was shocked. What could he possibly mean by that? Was it so obvious to him that I was falling for his 16 year old brother. I just brush it off, and play along. "Oh yeah, because I am just oh so in love with Nick. I mean how can I possibly be not? I mean look at that hair of his, so...beautiful!" I sarcasticly say to him. "Hey, hey, hey! I was just kidding."

"And so was I!" He looks at me suspicioulsy but shrugs it off.

"That would be weird if you did though" he says quietly.

"What do you mean?" I'm interested now.

"I dont know. It's just. He's my little brother, and you're my best friend. You practically are his older sister, since we're all so close. And not to mention you are older then him. It's just...weird." He had a point, but in other ways, he was so wrong. I mean, sure we are so close, but I mean come on! In so many movies, isn't that always the movie plot? Best friend falls in love with the other one, they both fall in love and get married? Picture perfect. It's possible. Well can't it be?

"Joe, it's not totally weird if it were true though. Not saying it is. I'm just saying...if Nick possibly liked me or vice versa, it wouldn't be that weird. I mean, it's always in the movies. Friends fall for eachother, get married, have cute babies, grow old, die."

"Well, this is isn't a movie. I just don't think you should like Nick"

"Hold on a second! When did I ever say I liked Nick? Wait a moment as I read the conversation notes, yup! Never said I liked Nick. It's in the mental notes." He rolls his eyes at me and gives me a smirk.

"Then why are you getting so defensive?"

I sigh, "I'm not. I'm just stating an obvious point. Even if I did, in some alternate universe, it wouldn't matter. Because to Nick, I'm just his older brothers, ultra cool best friend, who he's known for years. Nothing more. So, lets just drop the subject ok?" He hesitently looks at me for a minute and lets out a sigh.

"Alright. It's dropped."

"Thanks Joe." I get up and make a start to the swings. "Push me? Please?" My face turns into the puppy dog pout that gets him every time. When we were in sophmore year, I had an emergency at school. Nothing to big, but big enough if you are a girl. I was in first period, which is a pretty ironic word to describe last block. Well, because I was in my first day of my period. I wasn't expecting it till a few days later, so I wasn't prepared. Joe happend to be in his spare block, and had a car. I need him to go to the store right away, because a panty liner can't last 8 hours. To top it all of, I was wearing white skinnies. Stupid decision, I know! I asked Joe to run and pick me up some tampons. Of course, being a boy, he said no right away. I wasn't going to just let him get away with that. I mean this is a total and complete catastrophe! So I gave him the look, the puppy dog look. Full of innocence and pleading. He fell for it. I mean come on, who couldn't resist?

We stayed at the park until it started to get really dark. Tonight was such a beautiful night. The stars were shining so bright in our little town of Lake Como, New Jersey. Our town is tiny, consisting of only 1,806 people and my old High School was Academy Charter High School.

Joe and I got back to our homes around 9. I went to my bedroom and sat on my bed, facing my window. I saw Nick sitting on his bed playing his guitar. He looks up and sees me, he just smiles. That perfect wholesome smile. I smile back. I wave to him a good night wave and close my blinds. I sigh and climb into my bed. I just lay there, in the dark. I can't sleep. I just wished I had a boy to lay beside me. I wish Nick would just let me into his life on a more personal level. Or, maybe Joe was right. Maybe it would be to weird for us to be together.

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** I find it to be a bit funny that people add my stories on their alerts and what not, but don't review. It's ok, I guess. I'm sure I'm guilty of doing the same thing. But I do wish and ask that you guys will review. Because honestly, I need to know if I should continue this story, and if it's really worth it. Or if I'm just wasting my time. So yeah. Please guys! If you are reading this story, Review it. **

**Thank you. **

**xoxo.**


	3. Dont let anyone scare you

**I'd swim the Ocean for you**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing except story line and characters******

**Chapter 3: Don't let anyone scare you. **

The next few days were hectic. The new school year was starting up, and I had to be prepared for an eight month period of intense schooling. I would also be moving across the ocean, to attend U.PORTO (University of Porto), in Portugal. I am planing on becoming a Journalist, and am striving to some day write for the Rolling Stones. That's my dream, my passion. At U.PORTO this semester, the plan is to get my BA in writing. To write is another love of mine and another stress relief. Poetry is my passion. To write poetry, is something that I have always done. Nobody of course has read anything that I've writen. Only me and my pen know what comes out of my creative brain. I have chosen to go there, because I decided to embrace my moms Portuguese roots, and I get to be staying with my family down there. All in all, its going to be a great experience.

Knowing that I am soon going to be in University freaks me out. I don't want to leave my family and my friends. Especailly Nick. I don't want to leave him, but I can't tell anyone. I can't even tell Joe that I am going to miss Nick more. Don't want to break that pretty boys heart.

The annoying sound of my alarm clock fills the room. I hit the snooze button again, but the beeping sound replays in my head and in my ears. "UGH! Shut off you stupid thing!" I get up and turn it off. "I know! I know! Geeze. Thank you!" I make my way over to my medium sized closet. _Where is it? _Looking around my once was tidy closet, I find my runners and PINK grey sweats with matching sweater. I throw it all on and make my way down stairs. Don't want to wake up the family at 6:30 in the morning. That wouldn't make them to happy. Outside the sun hits my face, and I breathe in the September air. I let out a sigh of pleasure, and stretch out my legs. I walk down the 3 steps of my house and make my way to sidewalk. I plug in my Ipod and "Shake it" by Metro Station starts to play. A perfect song for a run in the morning. I start to run and reach a comfortable speed. I breathe in the refreshing morning air. There is something special about running in the morning. The serenity it brings, the quietness of the street, the birds chirping so chearfuly, brings joy to my ears. I look around and see a shadow running behind me. I shrug it off, and just think it's another jogger. It starts to run faster and faster, and suddenly is beside me, matching my speed. I look up and see brown curly locks bounching up and down. I smile inwardly, for I know who it is. No other then Nicholas Jonas. "Hey stranger" I say to him.

He looks over at me and smiles, "I didn't mean to disturb your peacful jog, but you looked like you wanted company." I thank him for his thoughtfulness, another trait that I adore so much about him. It's little things like this that send butterflies inside of me. "I can't believe you're leaving tomorrow. For PORTUGAL. Couldn't you have just gone to NYU? At least its only a state up. This is the last mornign we get to spend time running with eachother."

"Yeah...I know." I try so hard not to show my dissapointment. I see a piece of my dark brown hair fall on one of my eyes. Nick takes notice and brushes it off. The touch of his finger sends noticeable chills down my spine and arms.

"You cold there?" He laughs.

"Nothing running faster wont change!" I smirk at him and start to speed up. He takes notice and starts to run faster. I start to run even faster and he ends up being on my tail. "Oh no you don't!" My heels start to spark dust as I sprint all the way to the oh so familiar park and swings. I make it first before Nick, "I WIN! Oh yeah! Whoot! Who's the winner? Who's the best? Kelsey Ramos! Kelsey Ramos...aka ME!" At this point, Nick is laughing so hard at my childish antics.

"Just get on the swing already so I can push you." After giving a small curtsie I take a seat on the hard plastic. I can soon feel Nick's strong hands supporting my tiny frame, placed oh so perfectly on my back. Push after push, I am starting to gain some air and soon enough I'm flying high in the sky. "Look ma! No hands!" I take my hands off the chains for 2 seconds, but quickly place them back on. To scared that I might actually fall.

"Kelse, you're nuts!"

"But you love me!"

I swear I hear Nick say more then you ever know, but I just shrug it off. Slowly the swing comes to a stop and I jump off. I walk over to Nick who is just sitting on the bench. I sit beside him, looking up. Our eyes meet, and my heart starts to race and those butterflies that are constantly haunting me come back. My cheecks start to burn and I look away, not wanting him to see. "I can't believe you're leaving, Kelse." Nick quietly says.

"Yeah I know, it's... weird." I return, the same tone of voice as him. "I dont' know what I'm going to do with you gone. You're the only girl that actually understands me, and gives me great advice on whatever. You are the only girl that actually listens to me when I talk. This sucks even more, because you are going to miss the talent show because you are the only one that I wanted to be there." Each word that he says depicts more and more emotion. I'm left speachless. I just look at him, with a small smile. "You mean the world to me Nick J. You are such a great guy, and an amazing friend. Don't forget that. I love you Nick." I say to him. Of course, he only thinks that I love him as a "brother", and right now thats how I want it to stay. "I love you too K-dawg. You are like my older sister!" Sting. Ouch. That hurt! (But saw it coming.)

"We should probably go back to our places. I need to take a shower, and get ready. A full day of fun fun fun, and of course, tearful goodbyes!" I add a dramatic touch to the last part, as a swing my arms over Nick's legs.

"You are such a drama queen. Come on Kelse. Let's get going". When we get back to our seperate homes, I made my way over to my closet, and went inside my washroom. I took a quick shower, and went back into my closet. I pulled out fresh underwear and a white lace bra. I look through all my tops to find the perfect one to hang out in. I picked out my red peanuts music tee (**/product.asp?catalognameFOREVER21&categorynamegraphictee&productid2048022711&Pageall -click to see**), grey skinny jeans ( **/product.asp?catalognameFOREVER21&categorynamedenim&productid2044785069&Page1# **) paired with my yellow JCrew flats ( **/wp-content/uploads/2007/12/citysuedejcrew.jpg **) and yellow Melie Bianco oversized purse, and red framed oversized sunglasses. I went over to my vanity and pulled out my makeup. I finished my make up and combed out the mess of hair I had on my head. I quickly and neatly straightend my dark chestnut hair. Careful to perfect every detail, I finished my hair, bangs perfectly swept the the side. I took one more glance over at my overall appearance. It was decent. I looked ready to hang out with the boys. I grab everything that is needed, and walk downstairs to find everyone at the kitchen table. I smile at my mother. Her petite frame was showed off elegantly by her simple fall dress and 1 inch heels. She always looked perfessional. She made quite the living of herself, since my father left, but lets not get into detail over that. I don't really like talking about that.

_FLASHBACK:_

_Why? How? I don't understand my father. I thought fathers were supposed to be loveing, and caring, and were not supposed to hurt anyone. Other then the bad men that attacked me or my mom. Or of course, those boys who wanted to go out with his precious princess. Those are the kind of people my dad was supposed to hurt. Not my mom. Not me. But he did. My dad beat me tonight. It never happend before, until tonight. He came home, drunk. I was scared. I never saw him like that before. He ran over to me and pulled my hair and slapped my face. I didn't know what I did. He scared me, and he hurt me. I started to cry, and got loose from his tight grasp. I ran over to my bedroom and saw Nick. He looked up from his books and saw me crying. Whats wrong?-he mouthed to me. Can I come over?-I mouth back Of course-he mouths to me. I open up my window and jump the small distance between him and I. I fall into his arms and start to cry. Hard tears. I've never cried like this before. "Whats wrong Kelse?" "My dad..he... hit me. I'm so scared Nick." Tears start to pour even harder now. "Shhh. It's going to be alright. Don't let anyone scare you. I'll always be here for you. I'm always going to protect you Kelse. Till the very end of our lives, I will always be here for you." That was 3 years ago. I was 15 and Nick was 13. The start of the love that was blossoming inside of me for Nick._

_END _

"You look good mom."

"Yeah Ms. Ramos! Lookin' hot! Don't let those crazy men get to head over heels for you." Joe joked with my mom. Joe and the rest of the boys took my mom in as their second mother. Where as she made them her own sons. She loved them so much, and was thrilled to find out that I was in love with Nick. She of course finds no problem with me likeing him, even though he is younger. Why? Because my dad was 2 years younger then her. Even though they didn't have a happy ending, she had better hopes for me.

I look over at Nick remembering everything that happend those 3 years ago. He catches my eye and smiles a gentle, warm smile at me. I return it and look away, at my mom and her best friend Denise (Nick and the boys mom) laugh about some new weight loss plan.

How can I be leaving tomorrow? For Portugal of all places.

Damn education.

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**I was bored, and I'm sick at home, so I thought I would just write another chapter. I hope you guys all enjoy it, and those reviews meant the world to me. Thanks for reminding me that this isn't a waste of my time. Please keep those reviews coming. (And then I'll have more motivation to write chapters quicker!) Sounds to me like a win win situation if you ask me!**

**xoxo**


	4. I'd swim the Ocean for you

**I'd swim the Ocean for you**

**Chapter 4: I'd swim the Ocean for you**

Looking outside, the weather wasn't exactly screaming 6hr flight. Infact, it was more screaming "stay home and don't go to Portugal". The clouds were dark and it was raining. There were no cars outside. Actually, there were no signs of any human life. Looking outside, you could tell that it was 5:30 am on a Saturday.

_Perfect_. I close my curtains and go to my washroom, drowsy and slumbery. Turning on the taps of my shower, I slowly take off my clothes. Stepping inside the shower, I allow the scourching water rush over my body. It engulfs me under its burning sensation as I flutter away into my own world. Soon the scent of coconut and lime shampoo fills the walls of the shower. It takes me away and soon enough I forget that I'm leaving my family, friends and Nick. Tears start to roll down my eyes and not before long they are rolling down my eyes. _I'm leaving Nick for 8 months_. I start to sob. These aren't normal tears however. They are full of frustration, hurt, guilt, depression and love. _Grow some strength Kelse. You have to tell him. You might not get the chance later on. You are in love with Nick Jonas. Don't you get it? He has to know. He might understand. _I turn off the tap and grab my towel. I wrap the fuzzy material around my body. Taking my shower gel and shampoo I go and place it inside my red travel bag.

Going inside the closet I will be gone from until Christmas holiday, I look for the perfect outfit. All of my comfort clothes that I would live in if I could, were packed away. _When I get to the Portuguese airport I have to meet with the dean of administration _I remind myself. Joe Luizo was noth just the dean of administration. He was also my aunts new husband. I guess who could say he was my new uncle. I would be staying with them during my schooling, and I guess you could say I was excited. It was going to be a whole new experience. Something that I never done before. It sent a chill down my spine, and anxiousness arouse deep inside of me. Looking through all my clothes I found something comfortable, yet professional. I picked up my dark blue skinny jeans and gold flats. _Where is that top? _Throwing my tops everywhere I found the one I was looking for. _There it is!_ I picked up my lucky blouse. Why is it lucky? It's more special then lucky. Nick gave it to me for my 18th birthday in July. He told me that it would bring me luck for my interview the day after. I can still hear the exact words he said to me.

"_Kelse. That shirt is going to bring you luck. I can feel it. I mean look at it. It's perfect, and it brings out the sparkle in your eyes." _It was a deep green short sleeve pleated chiffon blouse with satin trim and a self belt. It alsow had a ruffled placket trim. It was perfect. It was perfessional. It was from Nick.

I changed into my chosen outfit. I made my way over to my vanity and worked on my face. Blow drying my hair, I grabbed moose and crunched up my curls making them flow nicely. I grabbed my black framed D&G glasses and gold bracelet. To top it all off, I put on the finishing touches to my outfit, the gold cupcake necklace from Joe. It was a birthday gift for when I turned 16. He told me it symbolized the sweetness I brought into his life. That Joe, he's so cheesey but I love it.

Taking one last glance at my reflection, I grabed my suitcase, oversized gold purse, and letter for Nick. "Good-bye room! See you in December!" Making my way downstairs I could smell the swift aroma of pancakes. That mom of mine. She made my favourite breakfast that I always eat before a trip.

"Hi mom." She turns around with a gloomy look on her face. "Hey baby. Come here." She engulfs me in a suffocating hug that you would be crazy to let go from. I can feel the tears starting to brim my eyes. She whispers something unaudibal in my ear. "I'm sorry mom, you have to repeat that."

"Don't go. Drop out! I can't depart from my baby for 8 months." Sting. Ping. Ow. That was my heart breaking. I can't leave my mom like this. I'm all she has. I'm her only daughter. She has no husband. I'm all she's got. "Christmas" is all I manage to get out. "I'll be back for Christmas" I tell her. She looks up at me, with a small smile. "And what the Christmas it will be, baby" she tells me, "now eat". I laugh at my mom. Such a Portuguese mother. I love it. I sit down and eat all my pancakes.

"Hello?" A voice comes from the back door.

"It's open!" my mom yells to the stranger. Suddenly the whole room is filled with the whole Jonas family. Nick, Joe, Kev, Frank the tank, Denise and Paul are all in our kitchen. "K-DAWG! DON'T LEAVE ME! I CAN'T SLEEP! I CAN'T LIVE! I CAN'T EAT! MY WORLD IS FALLING APART! Ooo! Pancakes!" Joe runs to the chocolate chip pancakes that my mom made, and pushes me away from our hug. "Gee thanks Joe. What am I? Chopped liver?"

"No, but you certanly are not pancakes. By the way Mrs. R. these are fantasticlicious!"

"Thank you Joe." Mom just laughs at his crazy antics.

"Mousey don't leave me. Now I'm stuck with them. They aren't as cool as you!" the little 8 year old tells me. I look at his teary brown eyes, and my heart breaks. "Don't worry Turttle, I'll be back soon. Ok? I love you kiddo!" I give him the biggest bear hug ever. I can't believe that I'm leaving this kid. He was amazing.

"Come here you". I look up and Kevin grabs me into a big bear hug. "I'm going to miss you kid. Your are my little sister. I love you. Tell Nick" he whispers in my ear. I look at him- confused. He just winks and messes up my hair with his hand. "Love ya kid." Rolling my eyes, I tell him that I love him too, with a smile.

"Oh hunny come here!" Mr. and Mrs. Jonas give me a huge hug each. "We're going to miss you dear. You are like our daughter" Mrs. Jonas tells me, with tears in her eyes. "I love you too, Denise. Promise me one thing though?" She looks at me, "Sure what is it dear?" "Take care of my mom, please" I ask them both.

"Kelsey dear, we will. Don't you worry." Mr. Jonas reassures me. When my dad left, he stepped up the role of dad. I trusted him, and knew that him and Mrs. J were going to make sure my mom was ok. "Thank you", and I hug them both.

I look over and see notice that Nick is nowhere in the kitchen. I looked over and there he was, in the livivng room. He was unusally quiet and I wasn't to sure what to do. I walk over to him and we look at eachother, awkwardly. Everyone else was in the kitchen, talking and eating.

"Hey." I manage to say. He looks up at me. He doesn't say anything, and I'm not to sure what to do. "Cat got your tounge?" I joke and take a seat beside him on our leather love seat.

"You're going to school" is all he tells me. "Um, yeah. I am." I say back. "You're leaving me. I don't think I can really handle it. You're my best friend, Kelse. You're not just my brothers best friend. You're mine too, and you're going to fricken Portugal for school. What the hell. Couldn't you have just stayed here?" With each word that he chokes out, a single tear comes down my face

"Nick." I grab his hand.

"No Kelse. I'm serious." He pulls his hand away from me. I look at him, hurt. "I promise you Nick, you can survive 3 months without me. It's going to be fine. I'll be back during Christmas."

"I know that. I'm not an idiot. But you don't understand one thing though. You're going to miss the talent show, and there are going to be talent agents there. You know me! You know that this is something that I've always dreamed of. You are the only one that knows that, and how nervous I get before shows. You are the only one that can calm me down. I can't perform if I know that you will not be there, chearing me on."  
"Nick. You are going to do such a great job. You are so talented and have this stage pressence that is unbearable. You are going to do great. And I will call you that day. I promise you, Nick." He looks at me and by his expression, you can tell that he believed me. I smile at him. It was a smile full of sincerity and genuinity. I get up and give him a hug. It was full of love and friendship. "Uhm Nick. I have something for you." I pull out my letter for him from my pocket. "Here. Promise me though, that you wont read it until I'm gone." Hesitating at first he agrees and grabs the letter from my hands.

"Ok." We hug one last time and I whisper something in his ear. "I love you Nicholas Jonas." He lets go of me, and I get a whisp of his abercombie aroma. I walk away before I do another thing I would regret. I grab my stuff and head to the door. I say goodbye to my mom and the Jonas family one last time. Joe takes my bags and brings it to his car. We get in and I wave one last time to them. Heading down the street I look at the rearview mirror and see Nick open the letter, reading it. I turn, facing the window and tears start to form in my eyes as we make our way to the airport.

"Hey Kelse", Joe grabs my hand and I look up at him. "I love you, you know that right? You are my bestest friend. But remember one thing, and thats Nick would do anything for you, because he considers you his best friend to. So, don't forget that. He would even be stupid enough to swim across the Atlantic to save you from some creepy Portuguese man that you may have an arranged marriage to." I laugh at him and smile.

"I know. I love you Joe. You are my bestie. Forever." We smile at eachother and continue our way to the airport in silence.

_Bording Portuguese Airlines in 2 minutes. Last call for flight P758. Last call for flight P758._

I look at Joe and sigh. He looks at me and smiles. "There goes my little Kelsey, all grown up, on her way to University. You make me so proud" he says wiping away a fake tear.

"You are so dramatic Jonas. But that makes me happy. Don't change while I'm gone" I joke. "To late. I was already planning on getting you know, 5 new tats and become a drug dealer and stalk Alicia Keys." I roll my eyes at him. "Keep me posted" I go along with him. "Alright I will. By carrier pidgions because I'll be to broke to send you real mail." I laugh at him and give him a big hug. He squeezes me and lifts me up. "Bye Ramos. Love you."

I smile at him "Love you to Jonas."

And with that, I board the plane, making my over the ocean. Here we go!

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**Wow these chapters are getting longer, aren't they. Well, I hope you guys review. I really like those. **

**And I'm still sick at home. I have a fever-whoopie! I'm "burning up" if you will. ;) Ok. Enjoy. Review! **

**ps; Any ideas for the next few chapters ? I have some, but if you want to imput your own that would be great! I always like to hear what you guys have to say! So let me know!**

**xox.**


	5. Pt2 It's going to get harder

**I'd swim the Ocean for you  
Disclamer:** I DO NOT own anything except: storyline and Kelsey/Eveline.  
**Chapter 5: Part 2 of Chapter 4: It's going to get harder**

Kelsey left. She was gone for three months until Christmas break.

What am I going to do exactly? She's my best friend. I consider her my big sister. I would do anything for her.

She wrote me a letter. What would she want to tell me that she couldn't in person.

I opened the letter and started to read it.

_**Dearest Nick, **_

_**Right about now I have either just left the house and driving down the street, or am in an airplane. **_

_**I don't really know where to begin, so I'll just say it. **_

_**I love you Nick. And no, not like 'Nick you are my like my little brother, I love you'. More like, "Nick I am IN love with you. So I'm older then you, but when it comes to love there is no age difference." You consume my thoughts, you know my heart, you are what I am striving for. You are such a genuine, and kind hearted guy. You always know what to do for me. **_

_**That day that my dad hit me, you were the only person that I wanted to see. Not Joe, but you. And you willingly accepted me into your arms. You held me tight and close and whispered in my ear that you would always be there for me- and you were only 13. You are so mature for your age. Maturity that isn't even developed in most guys I know who are 18. It was right then and there that I knew I was falling for you. I wasn't falling softly, I was falling hard and fast. **_

_**It's killing me inside to know that I am gone. It's killing me inside that you don't love me back. Is it because of the age difference? Is that it? Because if so, screw it. It shouldn't bother you if you love me back. Also, those other girls, they are nothing. They don't know you like I do. I've known you forever. I've seen you through your roughest and toughest times. **_

_**Please don't let any awkwardness or anything like that ruin our friendship. I will hate myself forever if I knew I screwed up the friendship we have. **_

_**You're all I ever wanted. All I've ever needed. **_

_**I love you Nicholas Jerry Jonas. **_

_**  
Forever and always. **_

_**-Kelsey. **_

What the heck. Why would she say that to me? What the heck! She loves me? She drops the bomb that she loves me and then goes to college. Why would she do that? I thought she was better then this. All I've ever wanted? All I've ever needed? Oh please. This is a joke. A cruel and sick joke.

Whatever. I'm a 16 year old guy who doesn't need to get wrapped up in some relationship right now. I should be dating girls, and having fun with my friends. Even if the girl who loves me is amazing, fun, hilarious, outgoing, beautiful-wait! Did I just say beautiful? Sure she's good looking but-beautiful? No. Snap out of it Nick. She's like your sister. Friends since childhood. Don't get yourself caught up in that mess. She's gone. She wont be back for months. She's missing my show. She's missing the song I wrote for her. Kelsey Ramos' love for me is not going to affect me in any way. I'm not going to let that happen.

But, she loves me? Why would she love me? I'm nothing special. I have unruley hair that sticks up everywhere. I have weird eyes that are too small. I'm nothing special.

But love?

I mean sure, I love her. But, I love her as a sister, or a cousin. Not "love" love. Right? SNAP out of it Nick. You don't love Kelsey. You don't. You would have done anything for her, but not anymore. It's just going to be weird and difficult.

6 hours later...

_You're voice was the soundtrack of my summer, do you know that your unlike any other, you'll always be my thunder..._ Kelsey. Crap. That was the customized ring Kelse put to her name. Meaning anytime she sent me a text, Boys like Girls' sappy song will start to play.

_**Nickizzle- Arrived in Portugal. Hope you read my letter. Talk later?  
xox, K-Dawg.**_

Do I want to talk to her? Nope. Not at all. I don't know what I would say to her. I could yell and scream at her, or I could be totally cool which would be a lie. I'm not cool and colected over this situation. Not at all. No. I'm not going to talk later.

_**No. I'm busy. Going out. Glad you're safe.  
-nicholas. **_

Thats good enough. Not too cold. It doesn't matter though.

_S-C-A-N-D to the E to the L-O-U S damn that girl she's scandelous. Can't handle it, Can't handle it, damn that girl she's scandelous... _The voice of Gabe Saporta from Cobra Starship fills the room now. I look at the caller ID and see who it is. The perfect person to get my mind off the current situation.

Eveline.

"Hello?", "Nicholas?" says a seductive voice on the other line

"Yeah? Eveline is that you?" I ask in an innocent yet flirtatious way. Of course I knew it was her. I cutomized her ring tone so I knew. I just liked to have some fun. I'm a sixteen year old boy, sue me. "Of course Nicky, it is! Who else would it be?" she giggles. Gosh. That giggle sent nervous chills down my spine. "Hmm..Miley Cyrus? Is that your cute self?" I flirt. Why was I flirting? Oh yeah, because a-she was hot and b-Kelsey. "Oh Nicky. Don't be silly. It's me."  
"I know. I'm glad. So baby, what would you like me to do for you?" I ask her, with a hint of flirtation.

"Come over?" she asks me. Should I? I mean it's probably not the best idea. She is like a lion always on the hunt. I can be just another mouse that falls for her seduction, but whatever. I need something to get my mind of Kelsey. Because right now, that's all that's on my mind right now.

"Ok." I say with the sound of me clicking the off button.

* * *

**I hope you liked this chapter. Thank you for all the reviews, and emails stating my story has become your favourite or on your alert list. It made me so happy to read that. I had a girly giggle like moment at school when I saw it. **

**I also am sorry if I offended anyone by putting in "damn" or what not in the past chapters. I personally am not a fan of swearing, but it just seemed to fit. So I apologize again. I just think it kinda fits with the situation and character. :) I hope you still read the story though! **

**Oh and I'm feeling a bit better. I went to school the past two days, which is why I am updating this now. **

**AND.. Nick may be a bit.. OOC. Not to much though. **

**xox. REVIEW AND ENJOY! **


	6. It's going to feel tougher

**I'd swim the Ocean for you**

**Chapter 6: It's going to feel tougher, each and every day**

_We are now landing in the Portugal airport. Thank you for choosing our airplane, Portuguese Airlines. Have a great stay. _

Everything was different in Portugal. The air, the clouds and the dirt. Everything looked and smelt different. Getting your bags is easy and using what Portuguese you know is easy too. At least for me it was.

I picked up my bags and started to head towards the Arrival section of the airport. "Obrigado" I say to the man who helped me bring my bags out of the door. Wheeling my bags out, I catch the piercing blue eyes of an older man. His hair was lucious and black. He looked about 45 and was in very good shape. He looked at me and smiled. I waved at him and made my way over to him.

"Bon Dia, Kelsey." I smile at him and give my uncle a big hug. "Hey Uncle Joe." I smile at him again. He has got to be one of the sweetest uncles. He made my aunt happy, and thats what she needed. That's what she deserved, since the death of my late Uncle Ricardo. And Joe Luizo was such a sweetie. Good choice. "So, where's my aunt?" Aunt Maria was a beautiful woman, with long black hair and bright green eyes. People say I get my eyes from her. They pierced everything, and thats what men always fell for. It didn't help that my aunt was only 37. She was my moms younger sister, and when aunt and I are together, all hell breaks loose. Maybe she can help me out with my troubles with Nick. I sure as hell hope so. "She is back at the house, linda (beautiful, pronounced: leen-da)" he tells me. I nod and give a simpe, "ok." He picks up my bags, and we make our way to the car. We walk outside and I take a look at Porto, Portugal. I take everything I see in. From the smells of fish, to the bright lights and historic buildings. It screamed old Europe. It was exciting to look at my surroundings. I was finally here. I was going to university here.

"Now, Kelse. There are some things you should know about the school. You will be at our house. Also, many of your classes will be in English, but I signed you up for some Portuguese classes. I have a feeling your mom isn't speaking it at home." I laugh and nod my head, since it was very true. He looks back at the road, smiling, while the voice of a Portuguese opera singer fills the car. I sit back, and pull out my phone. Nick has got to have read the text by now. Right? I mean, it has been a good six hours. I pull out my cell phone and start my text. _Nickizzle- Arrived in Portugal. Hope you read my letter. Talk later? xox, K-Dawg._ Our nicknames for eachother. That meant no awkwardness. It was fun and chill. It showed no _Oh my God I miss you so much blah blah blahs_. It was normal and friendly. Perfect. Send.

I sat back and looked at the scenery outside my window. I could live here. It was beautiful. It was new. It was a side turn away from home.

I close my eyes and let the sounds of unknown words flood my mind. I drift off to sleep. It wasn't until 1 hour later I am woken up by muffled screaming. "KELSEY! MY LINDA!" I wake up and see my deranged beautiful aunt outside my window. I smile a gigantic smile and squeal myself. I open the door and jump at my aunt. "Aunt Maria! I missed you so much!" We embrace for what seems like eternity. Finally let go she smiles at me. "How are you hunny? How is your mom? Hows Joe? How's... Nick?" She winks at me with a raised eyebrow. I can feel all my blood rush to my cheeks, embarrassed. "Tired, Good, Crazy and... I'm not quite sure."

"Well, we have some catching up to do." She looks at my uncle and says something in portuguese to him, which could be translated to "We are going inside, bring the bags to her room, I love you!" We start walking up to a large gravel paved driveway. Behind it I see a school with many students all around it. My aunt and uncle live on campus, since he is a dean at the school. We walk inside the house, and the scent of potatoes and chicken overtake my senses. I sigh a delighted and hugry sigh and take everything in.

"Oh baby, are you hungry? You do look skinny. Come on, lets go to the kitchen, grab some food and get to talking. Feche a porta. (Close the door)." I follow her intructions, as my uncle closes the door. We walk towards a tiled and marble kitchen. Plates on the walls, and roosters on the fridge (A/N this is like my own house, actually) I'm reminded of home.

_All we need is a little bit of momentum, break down these walls that we've built around ourselves... _I fish out my cellphone from my bag. Opening it up, I am notified of one new text. Nick. I open it up and am shocked to see what it reads. He obviously read my letter. _No. I'm busy. Going out. Glad you're safe.-nicholas. _Nicholas? He never wrote that. He's mad. I can tell. "Damn it." I can feel tears start to build, but I take a deep breath. Brush it away, Kelsey. My aunt looks at me, concerned. "Are you alright, sweetie?" She actually looks concerned.

"No. No I'm not. I just possibly ruined a lifetime friendship. Because of stupid love. Damn it!" I can feel the tears starting to form. Those unsoughted tears. The ones that were starting to poor down my face. My aunt comes over to me and starts to rub my back. She whispers soothing words, as I start to cry-harder. I screwed up. I screwed up! I did something I shouldn't have done. Just from him calling himself Nicholas that I know that he's mad. I know him so well, that's why.

We stay this way for about a half hour. I couldn't stop crying. I loved him so much. I didn't want to loose his friendship. I'm a moron. A moron for telling him. Slowly, I calm down. My aunt gets up to get something. She comes back with a box, wrapped up in red paper. I look at her and she urges me on. I open it up, slowly, not wanting to mess up the beautiful wrapping job. I hope it up to see a beautiful gold, teal, silver journal. It looked victorian. It was the most gorgeous journal. Beside it, was a gold ball point pen. I look at my aunt, and give her a big hug. "Thank you. It's beautiful." She smiles at me, and tells me to use it for personal writing. Not school writing. I nod at her, and ask where my room will be. I decide to freshen up. She leads me up a gorgeous staircase, and towards a wooden door. I walk in and my breath is caught in my throat. The walls were painted a pearly white, with gold finishing. There was a mohogany queen sized bed, with a gorgeous deep red bed spread. There were large gold and red pillows all over the bed. In the corner, I could see a desk and vanity set up. In the other corner were two doors. I walked over and opened one it to find my washroom. I walked it and looked around. There was a large bathtub and toilet, as well as a clothes basket and mirror. I turn to find a door. I open the door to see my closet, which must have been what the other door led to. I walk inside. It was huge. I open up the other door, and walk back into my room. I look over and see a big window. I walk over to it and notice it had a door, leading to my personal patio. I walk outside and look over at the campus. It wasn't as busy, considering it was a Saturday afternoon.

"Kelsey!" my aunt calls from outside my roon. I walk over and poke my head out my door. "Sweetie, just so you know, we will be having some company over. The head dean of the school, his wife and 19 year old son. You'll like him." She winks at me and walks down the stairs. _Sigh. Perfect. Just great. A boy, and I look like crap. _I walk over to my luggage, and drag it over to my closet. I decide to put everything away. Afterwards, I pick out a causal yet dinner perfect outfit. I pick a nice white bubble silk skirt and red button up satin sashed blouse. I take a shower and get dressed. Making my way over to my vanity and mirro, I apply my make up.

_Let's dance, put on your red shoes and dance the blues. Let's dance, to the sound they're playing on the radio... _Mom! I rush to my purse and pull out my phone. "I've never been happier to hear David Bowie. MOM! I miss you!" I can hear my moms laugh in the background. "Hey baby. I miss you so much. I'm glad to hear you had a safe trip and flight." I smile, hearing my moms voice again. "Oh yeah, it was great. I miss you so much mom. But Aunt Maria and Uncle Joe are amazing. This house is beautiful, just on the campus. I'm so excited to be here." I say in one breath. "I'm glad to hear that baby. Everyone here misses you. But Nick has been unusually quiet." My heart drops. The thought and mention of Nick shakes me up. I can feel the tears start to form, but I brush it off. I don't want to worry my mom.  
"Hmm...thats odd. Who knows what's wrong with him." I hear my aunt call me down, saying the company has arrived. "I'm sorry mommy. I have to go. The dean and his wife and son are coming over for dinner. So I better get going. My hair is still crazy. I need to fix it quickly. Thanks for calling, and I will talk to you later. Love you mom." I say to her, sadly. "I love you too baby. Tell everyone I say hi." I say yes and hang up my phone. Quickly I control the my unruly curls, and place a silver head band and pearl necklace. I grab my red flats, and make my way downstairs.

As I get downstairs, I see a the most gorgeous hazel eyes, and darkest black hair. He's tall and toned. Wearing black skinnies, red shirt and a black blazer rolled up paired with black converse, He notices me and smiles. My heart skips a beat, and I smile back, shyly.

"Hello Kelsey, I'm Lucio Ramirez" He says as he shakes my hand and kisses both my cheeks. My breath gets caught in my throat. "Uhm..Hi. Nice to, um, meet you." I answer him, awkwardly.

Oh crap. This is going to be harder then it looks.

* * *

**I must be one of the sweetest authors, updating twice in a day, sometimes three. You must love me so much ;). **

**I hope you enjoyed the chapter. Reviews are wonderful. Please and thank you. **

**It's kinda funny... Luico Ramirez was just a random name. But as I look at it now, it's similar to this guy I know. His is very similar- L. Ramirez. No intentions to making it like that. But this boy, wow. HE's this beautiful Costa Rican I met when I went down there. heheh... But anyways. Enjoy the chapter, and thats all you get today. For right now, I am off to get ready for a friends party. Goodnight!**

**xox. **


	7. You know that I love you

**I'd swim the Ocean for you  
Disclamer:** I only own my characters, but you knew that already.

**Chapter 7: You know that I love you**

It's been six weeks since I met him. Since he touched my hand and kissed my cheek. It's been 6 weeks since I told the boy I love that I love him. It's been exactly six weeks that I've been here. Away from my home, and inside a new culture away from my own.

Lucio and I have become great friends. He's different then anything and anyone that I have ever known. He's sweet, kind, caring and charming. Actually, he's going to school for the same profesion as me. Journalism- the subject that brings people together, I guess. I'm not going to go and say I've gotten over Nick now that I've met Lucio. No, because that would be a lie. Getting to know Lucio has been great. Truly, it has, but in all honesty, he is not for me. And plus, he has a girlfriend of 4 years. Oh, and yeah, I'm not quite over Nick just yet.

It's been six weeks since I've talked to Nick. He wont answer my phone calls, my texes nor will he answer my emails. Joe told me that he's been fine, but partying alot. Is it because of me, and what I said? I knew that I shouldn't have told him I loved him. Because now he's changed. He's going out with friends, and coming home late. He's changing. But why do I still love him? Why does my heart still tug everytime I think of him and see his picture. Why do I still cry when I dream of him? Oh yeah, its because I'm in love with him, and that hasn't changed.

It was a sunny saturday morning. Refreshed and energized, I make my way over to my sneakers and running attire. Putting everything on, I grab my phone and keys and make my way out the door. Outside was beautiful. The campus looked like a historic landscape and national park put together. There were trees everyone and flowers. The buildings itself were historic and very European. Placing my earphones on, I turn up my red ipod shuffle. _Nth Degree _by Morningwood starts to play and my feet hit the pavement. Getting into a steady pace, thoughts begin to flood my mind.

_What am I going to do about Nick? Why wont he just be mature and talk to me? I hear that its not that hard to do. Actually, its quite easy if you were a mature 16 year old. The Nick I used to know would do that. He would talk about it, and be reasonable. Partying? Since when did he party? He never did. Not since he started to hang out with that Eveline girl. Eveline! Oh no. I hope he's not..._

"Kelsey, linda!" I look up and my eyes lock with a certain portuguese boy.

"Hey Lucio." I say and give him a hug. I look over at a petite burnette. Her hair was tied up in a high pony tail and was wearing red skinnies and a black polk a dot top. "Catelina!" I smile and give her a big hug. "Kelse! Hey sweets. How's it going?" I sigh and just look at them both. "I'm alright. Just thinking. Running helps me when I'm frustrated and what not," They both nod in understanding "what are you guys doing?" I ask them both. Catelina grabs Lucios hand and the both smile. We're actually on our way to the dock. Lucio has some surprise outing planned out for me." Lucio looks at me and winks and I smile in undertandment. Lucio told me what he was planing on doing. He was going to propose to Catelina tonight. The proposal was going to be romantic. Everything a girl would dream of. A boat ride to the islands and then a picnic under the stars. Then there's the guy, with a guitar in hand, singing you your favourite serenading song. _The girl _by City and Color being hers and _More then anyone_ by Gavin Degraw being mine. It was a dream proposal, and she was getting it tonight. I was excited for her, to say the least.

"Well I hope you have fun, whatever the surprise will be" I say, giving Lucio a quick wink. We say our goodbyes, and part ways. I put my earphones back on and start my run. Hoping all distractions are put aside.

I spoke to soon.

I can feel the vibrations from my phone come from my pocket. I open it up. "Hello?"

"Kelse? Hey, It's Joe." I smile. I missed his voice. It's hard being away from your best friend. It's hard going across the ocean to go to school, when your best friend is at home working on his cupcake business. Joe made the best cupcakes. When I was having a bad day, he would give me his famous chocolate chip and raspberry cupcakes. It would always bright up my day. "Hi Joe," I say to the boy in the other line.

"What are you up to?" He asks me. I knew exactly what he would say when I told him what I was doing. "Running." I can hear him sigh in the background. "Whats wrong Kelse?" Knew it. I knew him so well, and so did he. "Take a guess at it." He doesn't even stop to think. "Nicholas? Kelse. Get over him. Please. He's not worth the tears. There are better boys out there." It wasn't that easy. "Joe. I can't. I love him. I actually do." Thats all I could say without the tears starting to fall. There was silence on the other line. "Joe?" After about a minute, he finally speaks up. "Honestly Kelse, I don't know what to say. I don't know what's wrong with that boy. I don't know why he's acting like this, because I know my brother, and he's usually better then that. Why he's ignoring you is beyond me. Really, it is. You're going to be back in town soon. So, maybe, when you get back, talk to him."

Joe was right. He always was. Maybe I just need to give it some time. "Alright. I will. But tell me one thing, and one thing only, is he seeing anyone?" I was scared to know the answer, and Joe knew it. He hesited before answering me with a simple "yes". My heart stoped. I could feel the tears start to form, and I didn't even stop them. "Who Joe? Who?" I scream them harshly into the phone. I don't even care who's looking or watching. I need to know who. "Eveline." Ouch. Break. Tear. My heart stopped. That girl? She wasn't good for him. He was better then that. She was a tramp and he knew it. "What? Why? I thought.. I.. I thought he was better then that." The tears kept on falling, harder and harder. "Kelsey, it's nothing special. It's nothing real. It's only hookups." That was worse. It meant he could be doing anything with her. "I have to go. I can't... I can't even bear this anymore. By Joe."

"I'm sorry Kelse. But remember that I love you. Ok?" I smile slightly at what he said. "I love you too.. bye." I shut off my phone. I'm sitting on a cold bench alone. Tears are falling and soon enough my face and arms are drenched. My heart is broken. I go back to the house and back to my room. I take off my running clothes and put on a big t-shirt and sweats. I take my journal and pen, as well as my ipod. I make my way up to my favourite place in the house. It was the upstairs belcony. It was a secluded area that faced trees. No one could see it and it was nice. I sat on the comphy couch that I asked my uncle to bring up there, just for me. I sit down and put my ipod on shuffle. _Dark blue _by Jack's Mannequin starts to play.

_Slow down.. this night's a perfect shade of  
Dark blue (dark blue)  
Have you ever been alone in a crowded room when I'm here with you  
I said the world could be burning down  
Dark blue (dark blue)  
Have you ever been alone in a crowded room well I'm here with you  
I said the world could be burning 'til there's nothing but dark blue..  
Just dark blue_

Memories start to come back to that one night. It was last summer. Nick and I were hanging out at my place. We were outside on the deck, the starts shining especially bright that night. The sky was a beautiful shade of blue. He took his guitar and started to play this song. He started to sing to me. It was was a night of perfection. Since then, everytime that song would play it reminded me of that perfect night.

I started to write. Right when my pen hit my journal page I couldn't stop. I look at what I wrote. It was heavy hearted and full of loss love and hurt. I looked at in and thought of Nick. I knew what I had to do. I had to give this poem to him. And I will.

In two weeks I would be going home.

Two weeks, 5 hours and 35 minutes exactly.

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**I hope you enjoyed this chapter. I'm excited to see where this is going, and I hope I'm not rushing it to fast. I don't think I want it to long. We'll see. :)**

**Happy mama day to all your moms.**

**Oh and next chapter... Kelsey is going home. **

**xox. **


	8. You're all I've ever wanted

**I'd swim the Ocean for you**

**Chapter 8: You're all I've ever wanted.**

Everything seemed like a blur. Stepping onto the plane, landing, walking to get my luggage. It all seemed to be surreal. I was finally home for the holidays. Mentally I was prepared, but emotionally I wasn't there yet.

I was going to see Nick.  
Holding tight to my hobo bag, I made my way to the check-out point. Walking out, I could hear the joys and crys of family and friends reuniting. Looking around, I spotted a tall olive skinned guy with shaggy brown hair. I made my way over to him. Once I made my way over, he grabbed me into a tight hug. I could feel his hot breath on my ear as he said "hey Kelse." It felt like it had been forever since I last felt my best friend's warm embrace. I looked up and our eyes met. I smiled at him. His mouth turned into a joyus grin as he reached over to grab my bag.

"Welcome home. Miss me much? I'm sure you did." I look over at him and smiled. I did miss him. But I missed my mother more, and was determined to make that clear. "Where's my mom? I missed her so much! Is she alright?" I lightly say to him. He looks over at me, "She's at Locus waiting for us. We have reservations for a welcome home for the holidays dinner." My heart skipped a beat as I remembered how much I loved Locus. It was a small restaurant, that served the best yam fries. My mouth started to water at the simple thought of tasting that delicious sensation.

Driving over to the reasturant was full of catching up and singing along to the sounds of The Perks, a local band we both enjoyed.

"You know, I must admit, I wasn't to sure what your mood was going to be like." He tells me, quietly.

I look over to him, full of curiousity. "What do you mean?"

He sighs, "I just mean, with everything thats been going on with you and Nick. I wasn't sure how you were going to be, coming back and all." My heart started to beat faster at the thought of Nick and his new girlfriend. I could feel my eyes start to burn, indicating fresh tears were wanting to fall. "Honestly, I don't know about all that. I mean, I love him. But, he likes what's her face. I can't do anything about that." I tell him, quietly, not wanting to cry. I look over at Joe and his face was straight. I couldn't tell what he was feeling inside. He was showing no emotion and was staring straight, at the road.

His mouth starts to move, but stops. He starts again, and sighs. "You deserve better."

I wasn't sure what he meant by that, and said nothing, hoping he would continue. And he did.  
"I mean, you deserve the world. You deserve a guy who will love and cherish you for all you are worth. Not like the dumbass of a brother I have **(sorry for the swearing guys..but it just works for the moment.)** You deserve someone who is going to treat you like a princess. Who is going to love you so unconditionally like you love them." I was speachless. I didn't know how to respond.

"Well, if you know of someone who will, let me know." is all I can say.

He sighs. "I don't know. I'm just saying, you should just get over Nick. I'm your best friend, right? So I think I have a right to put in my two sense."

"Well, I appreciate it. It's harder said then done though. You can easily tell someone to get over somebody, but when it comes down to it, it's hard." He nods his head in agreement, and sighs, "I hope that someone comes soon."

The rest of the ride was silent.

We arrived at the restaurant at around 6:30. I stepped out of the car and made my way inside. It was dimmly light. Looking over, I saw a table of baloons, tied up to a chair. It read "Welcome Home Kelse" and on another "...For the Holidays!". I silently chuckled to myself, and made my way over. Everyone who I would want was here. My mom, Mr. and Mrs Jonas, Frankie, Kevin and Nick. Beside him was a petite red head who I didn't recognize. It wasn't until I saw her face was when I knew who it was. It was Eveline, freshly coloured hair and all. It was cut short, in a bright red bob with blonde pieces here and there. I looked over at her and she smiled. Not wanting to be rude, I gave her a slight smile, and walked over to my mother. I grab her into a tight embrace and we stayed like that for a minute. "Mom, I missed you." I breath into her hair. She lets go of me and smiles. "You have no idea kid, you have no idea." I make my way over to the Jonas' and give them a hug. I walk over to Frankie, he gives me a gigantic hug, "I missed you kid." He looks at me and smiles a toothles smile. "Me too! And look! I lost my tooth!" He says, proudly. I look at him, "thats awesome Frank. Did the tooth fairy give you any money?" He smiles and nods franticly. "Yes! A whole five dollars." I smile at him and ruffle his hair. I walk over to Kevin and he pulls me into a brotherly embrace. "Hey kid. I missed you." I look at him and smile. "I missed you too, Kevin! Man. You would love Portugal. The buildings are so rustic and historic. You would die if you went there." He smiles. "I guess I'm going to have to jump on that plane with you and take a look for myslef!" I walk over to the other side where my chair was with the baloons and sit down. I look over at Nick who is across from me. Our eyes meet for two seconds, and I look down. Pushing down those butterflies who want to reappear. "Hi." I tell him, quietly, looking up through my eyelashes, not wanting to make actual eye contact. "Hey." Is all he says back.

I hear a cough and look up. "Hi! I'm Eveline." Says the girl I secretly despise, all perky. "Hello." I return and look back down at my menu. I hear a "..uhm okay" come from her perky lips.

The night went by reasonably well, despite the fact the boy I'm in love with's girlfriend was present. How the school is and how my aunt is were the topics of discussion for the night. At around nine we all started to make our way to the door. Outside we all make small talk before departing ways. I gave everyone a hug, until I came to Nick. I looked up at him. Not wanting to hug him and feel his warm touch, I give him a piece of paper. "Here. You don't have to read it if you want, but I suggest you do." It was the poem I wrote. Not saying a word, I look over at his girfriend. "It was nice to meet you. Take care." I tell her, trying to be civilized, and smile at them both. I walk over to Joes car and get in. The ride back to my house was silent, not wanting to disturb eachothers thoughts.

**NICK:**

Sitting on my bed, I didn't know what to do. I stared at it, hoping it would just walk away. I couldn't bare myself to know what it read. What it was she wanted to say to me. Judging by her attitude at the restaurant, it probably wasn't the best.

I picked up the paper, unfolding it gently, not wanting it to rip. It was a poem.

**_(a/n: This is a personal poem, so please, don't steal it or use it. Thank you.)_**

_I hear that same song  
The same one that is overplayed, constantly.  
It reminds me of you  
And all the times we shared  
The laughs, the jokes the tears and talks  
Whatever happend to that?  
Why did we allow those moments  
wither away  
Allow the awkwardness and frustration linger  
We used to be close  
Good friends  
Friends that had no problems  
But we let that slip away.  
__One wrong thing happens and its not the same  
So I liked you.  
__What's wrong with that?  
But its not the same anymore  
Is it because you feel the same way too?  
So let that same song play  
Because its the last thing that reminds me of you. _

Speachless, is what I felt. I didn't know what to say. It was true.

Everything.

But she wanted out. I just couldn't let that happen.

Maybe because...I loved her too.

* * *

**Sorry It's been awhile. School has been hectic, and I had a play. Thankfully it's coming to an end-soon. So I thought I would release alot of my stress into this story.  
I hope you enjoy!  
Now I'm off to finish Twilight. I haven't read it before. It's amazing. **

**In just 2 days, I am more then half way done. So close. **

**'night. **

**xox. **


	9. All I've ever dreamed of to come

**I'd swim the Ocean for you**

**Chapter 9:** All I've ever dreamed of to come, and yes you did come.

_Please pick me I'm a terrible mess, You know I just can't help it and I just gotta confess ,You do what you do and I can't ever rest, So still I'm gonna do everything,  
I'm gonna make it right, I'm gonna make it good, I'm gonna do it alright, I'm gonna write it down, I'm gonna make a sound... yeah. 'Cus I'm doing everything for you  
because I love to be near to you, Something just takes me away, to a place where I'm happy I'm doing everything for you, Yeah you know that I adore you  
And I just can't take it anymore (SONG: I'M DOING EVERYTHING FOR YOU - THE ROCKET SUMMER) ..._Nick's smooth voice carries out towards me. The room was darkly light by the few candles surrounding us. The sparkle of red and gold from the surrounding carpet, illuminated through his eyes. The smell of strawberries and chocolate filled my senses. I looked into his deep brown eyes and he started to lean in. Closer I can feel his hot breath on my lips. I could almost taste his breath as he leans in farther and farther. My heart starts to beat quickly and Nick is a milimeter away from me until.. **BEEP**! went that clock. That menice that loves to destroy my hapiness.

I didn't want that dream to end.

It wasn't realistic though. How I would wish that it was, though. That he would be there, right beside me, right now. Inches away, so close that I can almost taste his hot breath on my skin. To feel his curls underneath my palms. To feel his muscular grip around my waist, strong yet gentle. Holding me protectively so that noone can hurt or touch me.

How I wish it would be true.

To push my head up to his chest. To let me into his world, and into his thoughts. To let me into his heart where I only wish to know the inner depths of! How I wish I could just lay down on the dry grass of my back yard, with him beside me. Looking up at the stars. Peaceful and silent. With the only sounds of our soft breathing, enjoying eachothers company.

How I wish it wasn't just a dream.

But sadly it was. And that's all it would ever be. I'm letting go of him. Letting go of the one and only true love, that is Nicholas Jonas.

**NICK:**

My heart was thumping louder as I got off the plane. I yelled for a cab and gave them the address.

I wasn't going to let her get away that easily.

Not yet at least. This was my last shot, my only chance, to win her back.

Finally we reached the univercity. Opening the door, and paying the driver, I made my way over to where I knew was her house. Knocking gently her aunt opened the door.

"Nicholas. Hello!" She quietly said, kissing each cheek-the typical Portuguese hello. Following suite, she grabbed my arm and led me inside their large european style home. It was a work of art. The fine gold trimmings and rustic atmosphere made me feel welcomed and almost home. "Up the stairs, the last door on the left. She's not home quite yet, but you can wait for her there." She smiled at me. Her aunt agreed from the beginning, when I first called her. Almost relieved, but yet excited, she advised me to come right away.

"Thank you again, Maria". She smiles at me warmly and grabs my bag-"I'll put these in the spare room", thanking her I make my way up the stairs. Opening the door, the fresh smell of strawberries and honey fill the room. I smile as I look around. I see a vanity at the side of her room, near her open window. Making my way over I see her make up, spread across the small table. I smile at the memory of when she bought her first make-up kit. _**FLASHBACK**__:  
"Look Nick! There are way to many different kits to choose from. How the heck am I supposed to know which one is the best kit fit for my face? My colour skin tone? My eyes? My hair? Dang it! This is to hard!" Kelsey faced the stand of different make-up kits, fit for different skin tones, face, eyes and hair. Her eyes are full of confusion and frustration, and her brow squinting in confusion. She looked cute. "Honestly Kelse, it doesn't matter. Whatever you choose, it wont matter. Because you're going to look beautiful no matter what." I reasure her. She looks over at me, with a small smile played on her lips. "Thanks Nick. You sure know what to say to a girl for only 11." She laughs. I just smile at her and pick up a kit that's infront of her eyes. "Perefect. Fit for all olive skined girls, with chestnut brown hair. Look. There you go." I tell her. She snickers and pulls the makeup kit away from me and dashes for the front counter. I look after her and something inside of me jumps. It was my heart. Maybe, just maybe it was an indication of how much I was starting to fall for this girl. But it could never happen. She was 13, I was 11 and we could never be together. Never. __**ENDFLASBACK**_

That was the day that I guess you could say I started to fall for my older best friend. She was perfect in every way, and I was blind to realize that she too could love me back. And I could loose her. That just couldn't happen though, no, it can't. I look at the pictures she has on her vanity. There are a few of her and her mom, and one of her dad and her-smiling. There are 4 of her and Joe and one of her and kevin swinging on the swings. But there is one that I couldn't stop looking at. It was one of her and I. Never can I remember such a beautiful picture be taken. It was black and white. It showed her and I sitting on a bench, a tree on either side, and was close up to us. She was sitting on the right looking to the side, holding her hands on her lap. She wasn't smiling, but staring off to the distance, focused on something hair flying in the wind. I was beside her, my arms wrapped in front of me. I'm looking over at her with a smirk on my face, curls flying everywhere. I pick it up and turn it over. On the back it read: _Nick and Kelse, summer of 07. Perfect match? I think so. Love, Pipper. _Pipper. Of course! Only she would take such a beautiful photo. She was our photography mastermind, who moved to New York to persue it as a career. _Perfect match._ Huh. I guess it was obvious to everyone except me. I hear the door open and a gasp. I look over and see Kelsey. I smile at her.

**KELSEY:**

"Nick. What are you doing here?" I look at the one person I didn't want to see standing at my vanity. I walk over to him, and notice what it is he's holding. "Beautiful picture, isn't it?" I quietly say. He does nothing but nod. I grab it from him gentely and look at it myself. "Yeah. Pipper gave it to me before she left. Huh. Ironic isn't it? What she wrote. Perfect math. Yeah right." My voice seems to come out more bitter then inteded. I hear a sigh come form Nick.

"Kelse." He says, "I've realized something." He looks over at me and our eyes meet. My breath gets caught in my throat and I feel as if I'm going to choke. He grabs my hand and draws me closer. I move closer to him, unable to think let alone breathe. I'm looking down, because if I look up, I know I wont be able to have oxygen make its way to my brain. He grabs my chin and pulls my head up, and I reluctantly obey. He looks at me. His eyes are small, and soft. His eyebrows are scrunched together.

"What have you realized" I squeak. How I am able to make a coherant sentence is beyond me. He looks into my eyes, deeply. He starts to lean in closer, his lips almost touching neck. I can feel his breath on my neck, and the smell of his cologne is intoxicating. If this was a dream, I didn't want to wake up. "I've realized that you're all I've ever wanted, all I've ever needed to come."

"And yet you came." I say to him. He smirks and looks at me again. For a freshly turned 17 year old, he seemed to know exactly what it was he needed to do. He moves closer to me. Our lips are almost touching. My heart is pounding so hard that I think its going to burst through my chest. He wraps his arms around my waist, fitting perfectly. I place my arms strategically on his sholdures. I lick my lips gentley, and bite my lower lip. All I'm focusing on are his lips, perched in a small smirk. Slowly he moves his head closer and closer towards mine. I can feel my breath slowly leave me. He moves closer towards me, and our lips slowly meet. In a soft peck, my world turns upside down. To be in his touch and in his embrace, my life seems perfect. I go in for it again, and I kiss him, our lips meeting again. Slowly our kiss deepens. My hands make its way up to his hair and they get caught in his curly mess. Nick stops the kiss, "Kelsey. I love you. And i'm sorry for not realizing this earlier." I smile and reply to him in a kiss. He understands that I'm telling him, "I love you too," and returns the kiss, stronger this time. Becoming deeper and deeper, I slowly back up onto my bed. Laying my small head down gentely on my pillow he is still holding me, his arms still wrapped around my waist, but one holding the back of my head. Trying not to squish me, he deepens the kiss. I can feel his tounge begging for entrance and I allow him entrance. Our tounges begin to dance to a slow rythm and everything that I ever hoped and dream of becomes real. We let out all the lust and love that has built up over the years to release. We stay in this position for a while, only twice stopping for air.

I can feel Nick start to move down to my cheek and to the side of my neck making his way down. His lips are now on the base of my collar bone and he just stops there, giving me butterfly kisses. It tickles, and I let out a small laugh. He looks up at me and smiles. A warm and genuine smile. I start to move up and push him over so I am now on top of him. I push my head to his chest and I let out a small sigh. I look at him and just kiss his cheek, and continue to lay my head on his chest.

"I love you Nick. More then you will ever imagine." I can hear his heartbeat, his chest moving up and down. "I think I do, because I love you more. Man, do I love you more Kelsey. I want you so bad, can you feel it to. Ugh. You know I'm just..I'm... so... I'm so in love with you. God I want you so much. I just, I need you. Kelsey. And your touch? God that touch. Thats all I ever dream of! And I'm sorry, so sorry, for being a jerk. Because honestly Kelsey. I would swim the Ocean for you. Yeah. The ocean." I smile at this thought. Because he did. Basically. He came all the way to Portugal across the atlantic ocean, just to tell me he loves me too.

"But you just never had let me in before. So I gave up. Until that letter. That one letter. And then the poem. It just seems-perfect. Don't you think?" I smile at him, "Yeah Nick. It dose. And I just hope that it never stops. Because right now, I could never be happier. Never." And we lay in that position for the rest of the afternoon.

**THE END.**

**

* * *

**

Well loyal readers, I've ended my story on a good note. I hope you enjoyed it as much as I've enjoyed writing it.

I'm thinking about writing a sequel, but I'm not quite decided yet.

What do you guys think? Hit me up with some reviews and let me know if you want me to write a Kelsey/Nick story numero 2! And if I get inspiration and guarenteed readers, then I'll think about it for sure.

The next chapter will just be the lyrics to the song. I give all the credit to Metro station for writing such a wonderful song that sparked inspiration for this story.

Love you all and goodnight.

And review please.

xox. j.


	10. Kelsey

**The lyrics that sparked inspiration for my story. I give all credit to these boys. They are amazing songwriters and performers. I love them. See if you can catch on to how each verse or line sparked inspiration for each chapter. :) **

**xox. j.**

**KELSEY By Metro Station**

So take one word you said  
You put it in you're bed  
You rest you're tiny head on you're pillow  
You wonder where you're going next  
You got your head pushed to my chest  
And now you're hoping that someone let's you in  
Well I sure'll let you in  
You know I'll let you in  
Oh Kelsey, you

So don't let anyone scare you  
You know that I'll protect you  
Always, all through the thick and thin,  
Until the end  
You better watch it  
You know you don't cross it because  
I'm always here for you,  
And I'll be here for you  
(I know x3) I know how it feels, believe me,  
I've been there, and  
(I know x3) I know what it feels like  
Tell me, Kelsey

And I'd swim the ocean for you  
The ocean for you,  
Whoa oh, Kelsey  
And I'd swim the ocean for you  
The ocean for you  
Whoa oh, Kelsey  
Oh you, darling

Now it's gonna get harder  
And it's gonna burn brighter  
And it's gonna feel tougher, each and every day,  
So let me say that I love you,  
You're all that I've ever wanted,  
All that I've ever dreamed of to come  
And yes you did come  
I want you so bad (so bad)  
Can you feel it too? (it too)  
You know I'm so, I'm so in love you  
I want you so much  
I need you so much  
I need your, I need your, your touch

And I'd swim the ocean for you,  
The ocean for you,  
Whoa oh, Kelsey x4

And you never, ever let me in (let me in)


End file.
